This was an unreal experience had by my friend. The story was written by me, about his experience with Fifth Third Bank (specifically the branch on S. Rutherford Blvd., in Murfreesboro, TN). I was with him during most of the conversations and happenings herein, and what ever I did not experience first hand, he told me personally.
The following story is written in first person, as if I am him.
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I opened a bank account at Fifth Third Bank about seven weeks ago. It was a free student checking account. They told me I would receive my debit card in the mail in about two weeks (although, they told me most customers usually got the card within 5 business days).
So, two weeks went by. No card. Three weeks went by. No card.
They didn't even give me a temporary card: nothing. How much do they plan on inconveniencing me, the customer? If i want to make a transaction, I have to physically go to the bank and withdraw the money.
I called the bank numerous times between the second and third weeks. I even went up to the bank in person just to check on my card. I knew the person by name who opened my account. I always spoke to her -- sometimes another random teller, but mostly my account opener.
But none of that did me any good. I still had no card.
Finally, I called again. I explained that I had received other mail from Fifth Third at my address, but no card. So, it's not like the address "wasn't working". There was something wrong.
"We're sorry. We'll order it and have it directly delivered to our store/branch, but it will be another week."
Great. But whatever, I decide to wait it out. Again. For even longer.
Four weeks went by. Still no card. Still the same run-around. They order it again.
Five weeks went by. Nothing has changed.
Six weeks have gone by, at this point. I have been calling and stopping by the branch on a weekly basis, but no card.
"We'll send it up to our escalation desk. We'll have them FedEx us your card to the branch, here, again."
They guaranteed me they would have my card by the next friday. Guaranteed. They even said they would call me as soon as they received it.
It's friday. No card, no call. So, I decided to call them (at 3pm, since I have not heard from them at all yet).
"Oh, FedEx hasn't come yet, but they will come before we close at 6pm, so I will call you when it gets here."
Um, yeah, okay...I can see through your bullshit.
But whatever. I waited again.
The call never came.
The weekend came and went.
I called them Monday afternoon and demanded some answers, "You've ordered my card four times now. I am going to be completely honest with you, I feel like my account does not matter to you in the slightest. This is terrible customer service and I can not believe it's been seven weeks, and you keep giving me the run around. WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH MY CARD?!"
Apology, apology, please hold -- the usual.
Ten minutes went by, fifteen minutes went by...are you serious?
I have now been on hold for over fifteen minutes at this point. -- What could they possibly be doing besides delaying speaking to me, or just forgetting about my call all together?
Finally she came back on the line, "Sorry, they placed another order, we're not sure what happened."
WHAT?!
"I am NOT waiting another 2 weeks for a card!,", I screamed into the phone, "I am driving over there right now to close my account!"
"Well, let me double check at the escalation desk again, and..."
I interrupted her run-around speech, "I'll give you ten minutes. No matter if you figure this out or not, call me back in ten minutes. Otherwise, I will be up there to close my account with you. This is absurd!"
I hung up.
Ten minutes later, my phone rang. It's the bank manager.
"I am so sorry! I'm the manager, and I can give you a $20 gift card for your trouble! I can personally assure you, as the bank manager, that your card will be here on friday." Another week away. Really?
The manager claimed that this was the first she had heard of this, the first she was involved in the matter. I guess I should have asked to speak to the manager sooner. Silly me for thinking business gets taken care of without the customer having to complain and speak to a manager.
If my card is not there on Friday, I will take their money and close my account anyway. I will gladly take their minuscule gift card for my troubles, and give them until Friday.
Where is the efficiency? I kept getting the run-around. I'm shocked things have gone this far, and I am thoroughly convinced that everything you spend money on is a ripoff. Even the places where you keep said money.
Fifth Third Bank, YOUR SERVICE STINKS!
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